Little Rascal
by GoldietheFazbear
Summary: Golden Freddy has been turned into a baby, but he will not allow the adults to torture him. Will the other animatronics be able to withstand his outrageous and diabolical antics, or will they just get pissed off?
1. Freddy Meets Hell

Introduction

God damn it! I was just sulking around the hallways like any other normal day, but today was far from normal. I heard footsteps behind me, and I turned my head to see who it was, but before I could make out who it was, a violet stream of light sped toward me and hit me right smack in the middle of my face. Suddenly, an awful feeling swept through me, and my legs collapsed under my weight. My body started shrinking, and my head began to spin. I could feel my head getting smaller as my skull pressed further into my head, causing an unbearable searing pain. Soon, the dizziness overwhelmed me, and I blacked out.

Chapter 1

I woke up, was immediately blinded by the light, and I fell over. My head was throbbing like hell. Trying to resist the pain, I attempted to stand up, but my legs were no longer functioning properly. Furious, I jumped to my feet, but I fell on my face again. I was infuriated, and I tried to cuss, but instead, cries came out! All I could do was cry! To my horror, I heard footsteps approaching, and someone speaking. "What was that?" And another, "I think it was crying" "Who is it?" A concerned voice sounded. "Meh, it's probably Foxy crying about murdering that kid," The footsteps came closer, and I cried even harder. Suddenly, Freddy, Chica, and Bonnie emerged from around a corner. They all took a single look at me and gasped, some in horror, some in shock, and one in delight.

Suddenly, Chica screamed, "OH MY GOD! BABY GOLDIE! IT'S SO CUTE!" She squealed in delight as she picked me up and squeezed me HARD. "F*ck off!" I thought to myself. Fortunately, she put me down before I could act. "Holy crap! That's awesome!" Bonnie exclaimed. "No, it's not! I can't talk OR walk! What's wrong with you, you sick imbecile?" Angry thoughts streamed through my head. "Hey, shrimp! Come and get my finger!" Freddy shouted as he stuck out his finger and teased me with it. "Yeah, you see that? Go and get it!" He taunted. What an addlepated nitwit. I stood up, finally gaining my walking ability and tried to teleport, but I had lost that ability. Fuming, I sprinted to his finger and bit down forcefully, causing him to scream like a girl. "OW! SCREW YOU, YOU LITTLE BASTARD!" Freddy screamed as he tried to fling me off of his finger, but I just bit down harder. "GET OF MY F*CKING FINGER!" Freddy screamed furiously. "Freddy, you can't talk like that to a baby!" Chica scolded. Suddenly, I lost my grip, and I went flying into the wall with a sickening crash. Ballistic, I got up to my feet and found my voice. I screamed, "YOU KNOW WHAT? SCREW YOU, FREDDY! SCREW ALL OF YOU!" I stormed off. I locked myself in the supply closet and sulked in there for a few hours, until I realized that I had to piss. Really, REALLY badly.

I slammed the door open and scrambled over to the kitchen, where Chica was bandaging Freddy's finger. Freddy gave me a scornful glare. "So, you ready to apologize for ruining my life, you little abomination? He said angrily. "N-no! This is different!" I stammered nervously. "What, you wanna bite me again?" He scoffed. "Because that's not gonna happen!" "Freddy, PLEASE! I really need to take a piss, and I can't get onto the toilet!" I whined. "Um, NO. After what happened, I am absolutely not helping you, and I probably never am!" He said scornfully. Chica gave me a concerned look and nudged Freddy. "Chica, you do realize that's not going to work," Freddy explained. But Chica had more aces up her sleeve. "Ok, then. If that's not going to work, then I will give you two choices. You either take Goldie to the bathroom, or I tell Bonnie your darkest secret," Freddy immediately jumped to his feet. "Fine! I'll take him, but only because you forced me!" He screamed angrily as he stomped over to me. He handled me very roughly, and when he picked me up, I felt like my heart was going to fly out of my mouth. I gave Chica an angry look, and she winked at me.

On the way to the bathroom, I jostled and crashed around in Freddy's loose grip. Whenever I almost fell out, he squeezed me and jostled me upwards. "Freddy, STOP IT!" I screamed, irritated by his inexperience of handling babies. "Stop complaining! I was nice enough to take you to the bathroom, and now you repay me with this? Shut up, you ungrateful little bastard!" I thought of a great comeback. "Well, how would you like it if I grew up again, you turned into a baby, and I treated you like this?" I questioned. He must have pictured exactly what I pictured because his reaction was priceless. "SHUT UP! JUST SHUT UP!" HE screamed furiously. I snickered. "STOP LAUGHING! THAT'S NOT EVEN FUNNY!" He screamed, his eyes burning with fury. "You have to admit that you had your fun already," I told him. Freddy growled angrily.

When we arrived at the bathroom, Freddy swung open a stall door so hard that when he tried to go in, the door slammed in his face. "So, looks like the door's being a bitch," I said. Freddy picked me up by the arms with my face facing toward him. He was holding me a few feet above the toilet. I waited for him to set me down, but he never did. I crossed my legs, trying not to pee, but Freddy screamed at me to hurry up and go. "JUST F*CKING GO ALREADY!" He screamed. "Freddy," I complained, "I can't pee like this!" "So? Who cares?" He scoffed. "Put me down on the toilet and let me pee properly!" I screamed. "Oh yeah? What'll happen if I don't?" He growled. The pee was bursting to come out of me, like the air in a popped balloon. "THIS'LL happen!" I said as I let myself go and pissed all over his face. Freddy spluttered in disgust as he dropped me and screamed, "W-WHY, YOU LITTLE SHIT!" "Karma's a bitch, Freddy! Karma's a bitch!" I exclaimed as I ran out of the bathroom.

I went and sucked up to Chica about Freddy's abusive behavior. "Chica!" I called out. "Oh, hello there, Goldie!" She crooned. "Chica, Freddy was being mean to me!" I whined impatiently. "Really? It's not like him to do that," She replied, unsure if I was telling the truth. But the, she took one look at a bruise on my arm from being handled roughly and screamed, "FREDDY! COME HERE THIS INSTANT!" Chica's face had suddenly turned from sweet to sour. Moments later, a dripping Freddy stomped around and growled, "What do you f*cking want?" His face was dripping in water, piss and soap. He had clearly tried to wash himself, but he had desperately failed. I snickered. He noticed me and screamed, "And YOU! GET OUT!" Freddy was ballistic. "Now, Freddy, I know that you're upset, but can't you at least apologize to Goldie? After all, he's just a baby!" Chica convinced him."He's not a baby, he's an evil bastard!" Freddy exclaimed irately. "Freddy, enough with this crap!" Chica screamed over him. "Bonnie, go feed Goldie. He looks hungry," She snapped. "Oh, and one more thing," Chica said as she pulled out a long sleeve shirt and overalls. "Oh, crap!" I thought.


	2. Kitchen Conundrum

Chica had succeeded in dressing me up in clothes. Humiliated, I sprinted to the supply closet and hid. How could Chica do this to me? I thought that she was my friend! The closet door swung open, and Bonnie stood at the door. "There you are! Come on, let's go!" She exclaimed. I glared at Bonnie as she picked me up and walked to the kitchen. Bonnie set me in a high chair and strapped me in. "Exactly what the hell do you think you are doing, you blithering idiot?" I snapped. No reply. "Hey! Answer me when I ask you questions!" I demanded. "I'm feeding you so that you don't starve!" She snapped impatiently. She took a slice of moldy bread out of a pantry and tried to give it to me, but I turned my head and clamped my mouth shut. "Come ON!" She nagged. I picked up the bread and chucked it at the wall. "Hey! That was valuable food!" She exclaimed. "If you try to feed something like that to me again, you'll regret it!" I snapped.

Bonnie sighed and headed to the refrigerator and pulled out a rotting piece of leftover salmon. "What? She's not gonna feed me that! She wouldn't dare!" I thought. "Oh, CRAP!" My mind changed as Bonnie put the putrid fish in the microwave. Immediately, the rotting stench of fish filled the room, and I gagged, trying to restrain myself from hurling. When the fish was heated up, Bonnie set it in front of me. "Alright, let's get this over with," she muttered. "Open up!" Bonnie exclaimed. The fish got closer to me, the stench of it getting stronger. "NO!" I snapped. "Come on! It's got to be better than the bread!" She exclaimed. "No, as a matter of fact, it's worse than the bread!" I said scornfully. "JUST EAT THE F*CKING FISH ALREADY!" Bonnie screamed furiously. How could she do this to me? Enraged, I seized the fish out of Bonnie's grip and flung it at her face.

"AAAHH! EWW! OH MY GOD!" Bonnie screamed while struggling to get the rubbish off of her face. "OH MY GOD! THAT IS SO F*CKING DISGUSTING!" She yelled. "Well, if it's so f*cking disgusting, then why did you try to feed it to me? If you wouldn't eat something, then DON'T FEED IT TO SOMEONE ELSE! That's the rule!" I snapped. "Ok, fine! Maybe I wasn't trying hard enough, but I have absolutely no experience with parenting, so please deal with it!" Bonnie exclaimed, exasperated. "That reminds me. Can you cook?" I asked. "Yeah. Yeah, I actually can cook pretty well," Bonnie replied. A lightbulb went off in my head. "Well then, MAKE ME SOME LASAGNA!" I demanded furiously. "What? No! It's a waste of time and energy!" Bonnie exclaimed. "MAKE ME THE GOD DAMN LASAGNA!" I screamed furiously, slamming my fist on the tray of the high chair. "AAH! Ok! OK! I'll do it! Geez!" Bonnie stammered frantically.

The lasagna took about an hour to finish. After Bonnie put it in the oven, the warm scent of lasagna wafted into the kitchen and mad my stomach growl. When the lasagna came out of the oven, I could tell that Bonnie's cooking skills were immaculate. The lasagna was perfect, and I ate it in a few gulps. Satisfied, I called for Bonnie to let me out of the high chair, but to my horror, she was asleep on the kitchen counter! "BONNIE!" I screamed at the top of my lungs. "GET THE HELL UP, YOU LAZY BITCH!" I desperately tried to get her up, but ot no avail. "SOMEONE! GET THE F*CK OVER HERE! HELP ME!" I screamed, panicking. If nobody came to get me, I would be stuck in the chair forever. "Oh MY FUCKING GOD!" I screamed as I desperately tried to get out of the chair, but gravity jumped in, and the chair toppled over and landed with a crash. "BONNIE! HOW ARE YOU STILL ASLEEP! GET ME OUT OF HERE!"

Suddenly, an unfamiliar figure stood before me. He was a red fox with a hook arm and an eye-patch. To others, h looked like a pirate, but to me, he looked like a monstrosity. "AAAAAAAHHHH! OH MY GOD!" I screamed, flailing around in the now sideways high chair. "You don't know me?" The fox spoke. "Well, of course I don't know you! If I did, then I wouldn't be freaking out!" I snapped. "I'm Foxy, by the way. You look a lot like Golden Freddy," he stated. "Well, that's because I AM GOLDEN FREDDY!" I screamed at him. "Come on, let's go," Foxy growled as he unstrapped me from the chair.

Foxy took me back to Chica. "Ohh, there's my wittle cutie pie!" Chica cooed. "Shut up! Shut the hell up!" I screamed, aggravated. Freddy snickered. I gave him a death glare. "Oh, looks wike someone's a wittle cranky," Chica said in her pathetic baby voice. "STOP THIS CRAP AT ONCE!" I ordered. "Oh, you want this?" Chica crooned as she held up a pacifier. "NO! GET THAT AWAY FROM ME! GET THAT-MMPH! MMNPH!" Chica had stuffed the wretched pacifier in my mouth. Freddy started cracking up. "HAHA! That's what you get for pissing on my face!" Freddy roared. Furious, I spit the pacifier out at Chica's face. "CHICA! YOU STUPID BITCH!" I screamed. "Oh, now, now, sweetie. We must never say things like that," She explained. "SCREW YOU ALL!" I yelled angrily as I stormed out of the room, holding up my middle finger.

I ran and hid in the supply closet, but Chica found me again. "I have a surprise for you!" She exclaimed enthusiastically. I thrashed around in her grip and tried to get out, but failed miserably. Chica carried me to the Show Stage, where Bonnie and Freddy were waiting. Chica was gone for a bit, but when she came back, she was carrying a whole baby outfit! "F*CK!" I thought. As soon as the outfit touched me, I started crying and screaming my head off. "NOOOOO!" I screamed as thrashed around in Chica's tight grip. "Dude, calm down!" Bonnie exclaimed. "GET THE F*CK OUT OF HERE AND LEAVE ME ALONE!" I screamed furiously. "Shut up, you little brat!" Freddy snapped. "I'LL NEVER FORGIVE YOU, CHICA! I HATE YOU!" I screamed at her. Soon, Chica managed to get the outfit on me despite my squirming, crying, and screaming. "Ok, guys! Check out Goldie! Isn't he so cute!" Chica squealed. Chica had succeeded in dressing me up.

There was a frilly bonnet tied around my head paired with a pink diaper. I looked horrendous. "Now, THAT'S what I call funny!" Freddy laughed. "OH MY GOD! THAT LOOKS RIDICULOUS!" Bonnie exclaimed before bursting into laughter. I screamed, cried, and kicked even harder. "Just wait until everyone sees this!" Chica squealed. To my horror, she pulled out her FazMobile phone, took a picture of me, and posted it on Fazbook! Enraged, I gripped the diaper with two hands and pulled in opposite directions. The diaper tore with a ripping sound. Chica gasped, but I still had more evil to do. I jerked the bonnet off of my head and stretched it over Chica's face. "HOW DO YOU LIKE THAT, YOU BITCH? HOW DO YOU LIKE THAT?" I screamed. Chica let out several muffled screams and started panicking, running around in circles. Suddenly, Chica blindly ran into a wall with a crash. "Oh my GOD, CHICA!" Bonnie and Freddy screamed as they ran over to help a dazed Chica up. I gave Chica a scornful glare, and I stomped out of the room.

Still fuming, I stomped over to Pirate Cove. Foxy was chugging a bottle of wine. "Dude, you're gonna get yourself really drunk," I warned him. "I- I think I already am," He said drunkenly. "God, What ever happened to me? Why did I have to bite the kid? I'm a monster!" Foxy sobbed. "Um, that's not exactly why I'm here. I need to do something to Chica for dressing me up! I need some ideas!" "You w-wanna p-prank her?" He stuttered. "YES! I NEED IDEAS! I snapped impatiently. "W-w-well, you could-" Foxy slurred before leaning over and violently retching. "Wait..." I thought. Suddenly, an idea shot into my head. There were still bottles of ipecac and laxatives in the kitchen cabinet.


	3. Chica Gets it All

**Me: "You know how Goldie pranks Chica?"**

 **Goldie: "Hehe"**

 **Yeah, so I saw something funny in the reviews section, so I decided to post it right here. I don't usually do this, but here goes!**

 ***Freddy shakes vomit off of feet, splattering it all over Bonnie***

 **Bonnie: "HEY CHICA!"**

 **Chica: "YEAH?"**

 **Bonnie: "I'M SINGING IN VOMIT RAIN!"**

 **Chica: *BLARGHYA***

 **Bonnie: "AWESOME!" *HIGH FIVES GF AND FOXY***

 **All credit goes to "A Friend", who was a guest reviewer.**

 **-** When night fell, I decided to start. I had checked on everyone, and all of them were sleeping like rocks. Trying to be as silent as possible, I stealthily crept into the kitchen, locked the door, and turned on the lights. I pulled out a pizza recipe, and got started, but instead of water, I used a whole bottle of ipecac! I then did everything like normal, flour, butter, yeast, eggs, but I also threw in a whole bottle of laxatives! This way, if Chica ate the pizza, she would be violently ill for a long time! After a long and boring process of baking the pizza, I took it out of the oven to decorate. I know that you might think I just put regular toppings, but I didn't. I added ANOTHER bottle of laxatives to the tomato sauce, and I dipped the pepperoni slices in water mixed with ipecac! Not too long after, my evil creation was done! Now, I just needed to replace Chica's pizza with the super-emetic laxative pizza! There would be no problem with having the others eating the pizza, because Chica's food was always labeled with a sticky note that said, "Chica only. Off limits for all but Chica." I snickered as I switched the pizzas and put the sticky note on my laxative-ipecac pizza. Chica may have gotten away with humiliating me, but she definitely won't enjoy having to spend a full day in the bathroom!

When I woke up, it was already noon, and Chica was about to have her lunch. I decided to implant an audio bug under the table where we ate lunch so that I would know when Chica was about to puke her guts up. But I needed a place to hide my other audio transmitter device so that I could hear what was going on! "The supply closet!" I thought. There was a trapdoor above the supply closet that led to the attic! I could probably hide my audio transmitter up there, or even better, turn it into my secret hiding place! I clambered nimbly up the shelves and pushed open the trapdoor. The attic was fairly big, but it was full of dead bugs. Shuddering, I quickly gathered up the insects and put them in a box. I could dump them on Freddy, or better yet, hide them in tacos! After a few minutes of plugging in many wires and a pair of headphones, I was ready to go! I swung open the trapdoor, clambered back down, and dashed to the kitchen.

Foxy was sitting at the table, eating a salad. Bonnie was eating the leftover lasagna from the day before, and Freddy was eating macaroni and cheese. I whispered to Foxy, "Whatever you do, don't eat the pizza!" "Why?" He asked. "You'll see," I replied. "Hey, what are you guys talking about?" Bonnie asked. "Oh, we were just talking about something that I saw on FazTube that you probably don't want to see," I lied quickly. "Well then, why did you have to whisper it?" Freddy asked, suspicious. "It contained a bunch of swears and messed up scenes that you probably didn't want to hear," Foxy lied. "Well then," Bonnie said as she continued to eat her lasagna. "Whew! That was a close call," I thought to myself.

I heard Chica's distinct heavy footsteps coming down the hall, so I quickly put a wireless audio bug under the table near Chica's seat. I then climbed into the supply closet, climbed up the shelf, and got in the attic. I immediately plugged in my headphones, sat back, relaxed, and enjoyed what I heard. "Hey, Chica!" Someone said. "Oh, hi guys! Have you seen Goldie?" Chica asked. "No, he probably ran off to go somewhere else," I heard Foxy lie. I smirked. That imbecile Chica was easier to fool than a brainless fly! There was a chomp, followed by a nauseating chewing noise. "That's good pizza! But, huh. It tastes, well, a little weird, perhaps. Oh, well. It's probably just a bit old," Chica said. God, that nitwit didn't even suspect anything!

I heard some giggling, some gossip about me, and that went on for a while. Chica droned on, and on, and on about how "cute" I was. I groaned. This was the boring part, but it was worth the results. After about 20 minutes, I heard what I wanted to hear. "I don't feel too good," It was Chica's voice! "You okay?" Someone asked. "No, no, I don't think so-" YES! Chica's sentence was interrupted by a retch. "We've got to get you to the bathroom!" Freddy exclaimed. Snickering, I ran to the bathroom as quickly as possible. Sure enough, Chica was leaning over the toilet, about to hurl.

"Guys, go away! AW-" The sentence was interrupted by a barrage of vomiting. I watched in delight as my plan came to action. "Oh, my God, Chica!" Bonnie exclaimed. Chica wipe her mouth. "Oh my god, oh my god! I would yell at you guys if I could, but I can't!" She whined. Foxy burst into the door. "What's happening? I thought I heard someone barf!" He asked. "Um, yeah, that's Chica," I replied. Chica was vomiting uncontrollably. "OH MY GOD, MY STOMACH IS ON FIRE!" Chica screamed. I snickered. "That's what you deserve for humiliating me," I muttered under my breath. "Help me!" Chica moaned before doubling over, missing the toilet, and hurling all over Freddy's feet.

"WHAT THE F*CK!" OH MY GOD, EWW, EWW!" Freddy screamed frenetically. Just before Freddy shook off his feet, I darted into a cabinet under the sinks and yanked Foxy in as well. "What the hell?" Foxy exclaimed. Several nauseating splattering noises sounded, as well as several screams and shrieks. "I just saved you from vomit rain, so you better be grateful!" I snapped. Foxy opened the cabinet door to find Bonnie covered in vomit. "Oh, thanks," He muttered. Bonnie shot an angry glare at Freddy. "What are you looking at?" Freddy snapped.

"Somebody! Get the phone! Call 91-BLEEHHHH!" Chica managed to say before collapsing on the toilet in a fit of vomiting. "I'll go! Anything for you, Chica!" Freddy exclaimed as he ran out the door. "Eww," I thought. Freddy's coquettish behavior toward Chica was absolutely repugnant. After dialing fervently for quite a while, Freddy slammed the phone down and exclaimed, "There's nobody available on the line! Here, Chica! Take these!" Freddy shouted as he tossed a bottle of anti-emetics toward Chica. I honestly don't know how those got into the pizzeria in the first place. "What an imbecile," I thought. The anti-emetics wouldn't be able to cease Chica's violent vomiting. Freddy took a pill out of the bottle and offered it to Chic, but before Chica could swallow it, she failed to suppress her hurling and vomited all over Freddy's hands!" Foxy, Bonnie, and I all burst into laughter. "Looks like Mr. In-Love-With-Chica got puked on again!" I exclaimed. Bonnie and Foxy giggled. "SHUT UP! JUST SHUT UP!" Freddy screamed furiously, hands dripping with vomit.

Guffawing, I ran out the bathroom door, followed by Bonnie and Foxy. Foxy pressed an ear up to the bathroom door and sighed. "Well, Chica stopped hurling. I guess the fun's over, now. I'm gonna go," He mumbled. "Wait!" Remember, I put laxatives in that pizza!" The fun's not over yet, as long as I'm here!" I exclaimed excitedly. "Although, the laxatives won't take effect for at least another half hour," "Great! I can use this time to clean all this puke off of me," Bonnie said. "Ok, you guys go ahead, just be back in 30 minutes when the fun begins," I said.


	4. Pirate Games

30 minutes later, I came back holding a video camera. "Oh, oh!" Chica exclaimed in pain. I snickered. The laxatives had taken effect. "Ye feeling alright, Chica?" Foxy asked, trying not to look suspicious. "I guess, but Oh, god, it hurts!" She screamed. "I'll just be heading to the bathroom, and OH GOD, IT BURNS!" "Oh, god, she's gonna blow!" Bonnie screamed excitedly. Chica's stomach rumbled violently. "Oh my god! I CAN'T HOLD IT IN ANYMORE!" Chica screamed and ran to the bathroom, followed by me, Bonnie, and Foxy. I heard Chica slam the door to the toilet stall, and countless groans. Suddenly, a loud splattering sounded and Chica screamed. Guffawing, Foxy burst into the bathroom and kicked open the stall door, only to find that Chica had had explosive diarrhea and it had splattered all over the toilet. I rushed in, holding the camera. "Oh my god! Chica, you're such a baby!" Foxy exclaimed. Chica gasped, and when she saw `me holding the video camera, she went ballistic. "GET OUT! GET OUT-" Another bout of explosive diarrhea caused Chica to moan and double over in pain. Foxy was still recording. "Oh, gross! Chica!" I exclaimed sarcastically. "GET THE FUCK OUT!" She screamed.

We all burst out of the bathroom door, laughing so hard until Bonnie started to get violent hiccups. Hearing the noise, Freddy stormed over to the bathroom entrance. "What's going on in there? Is Chica okay?" Freddy asked. For once, I sensed the tiniest bit of concern in his voice. "Oh, I don't know if you heard, but your girlfriend just crapped all over the toilet!" Bonnie exclaimed, and we all burst into laughter once more. "SHUT UP! CHICA IS THE MOST BEAUTIFUL THING EVER. I CARE ABOUT HER, AND I LOVE-" Freddy stopped mid-sentence, realizing that we were all staring at her. "Oh, if you love your wittle girlfriend so much, then why don't you go ahead and fuck her in the bathroom while she's covered in shit?" I questioned mockingly. "SHUT UP! JUST SHUT THE FUCK UP!" Bonnie fell over and started rolling on the floor, laughing uncontrollably. "OH MY GOD! YOU GUYS OWE ME AT LEAST A MILLION FAVORS AFTER WHAT YOU'VE DONE TO ME!" Freddy yelled angrily. "Speaking of owe, Freddy, I think I owe you THIS!" Foxy got up to his feet and kicked Freddie in the balls. Hard. "Ow, BITCH!" Freddy screamed in pain and anger. Snickering, Foxy, Bonnie and I went back to the show stage.

The next day, I woke up early and headed to Pirate Cove, to find Foxy and Bonnie acting like a couple of kids, playing pirate. "Hey! You guys!" I snapped. Foxy gasped. "Oh, umm, h-hi, Goldie. We were just doing stuff, you know? Right, Foxy?" Bonnie stammered. "Y-yeah, we were, um, just doing some stuff," He explained nervously. Hm. Just then, Freddy appeared, and Bonnie screamed, "Hey! Cabin boy! Go get me a pizza!" Freddy growled and snapped, "Oh hell no!" Foxy stormed over to Freddy and pressed a knife to his neck. "What did you say?!" He growled and started pushing the blade into his neck. "OH MY FUCKING GOD!" Freddy screamed and stormed off to the fridge. "What's up with him?" I asked. "Oh, he just lost a stupid bet and has to listen to us for a whole day," Bonnie smirked. "Hey, you know what? I wanna play pirate!" I exclaimed. "Uh, OKAY!" Bonnie screamed ecstatically. I opened a chest that was near Foxy's feet and opened it to find a gem encrusted dagger inside. Feeling pretty murderous, I picked it up and swung it around in the air, narrowly missing Freddy's neck. "HEY! WATCH IT YOU LITTLE DOUCHEBAG!" Freddy shouted angrily. "HOW DARE YOU TALK TO THE FIRST MATE LIKE THAT!" I screamed, drawing the sword closer to his neck. "And you took way too long getting that pizza for me!" Foxy snapped.

"SO, WE'RE GONNA MAKE YOU WALK THE PLANK!" We all screamed in unison. "WHAT? HELL NO!" Freddy growled furiously. "Are you sure?" I sneered, pulling out a rope. Freddy's eyes widened as he scrambled to his feet. "NOT TODAY, YOU LITTLE SHIT!" Foxy yelled, slide-tackling him to the ground. I rubbed my hands together in glee as I approached Freddy and started to tie him up. "WHAT ARE YOU DOING-HEY! STOP!" Freddy gasped for air as I began to tighten the rope around his midsection. "You disobeyed me, THE CAPTAIN, and now, YOU'RE GONNA PAY FOR IT!" Foxy growled as he began to drag Freddy to the bathroom. Bonnie marched up to a toilet stall and kicked the door open. Foxy then held Freddy's head over the toilet bowl. My eyes widened and a smile came to my face as soon "Walk the plank, ye scurvy seadog!" I commanded. "NO!" Freddy screeched, flailing violently on the floor. "Heh heh. You remind me of a fish, Freddy. Shall we eat you instead of flushing you?" Bonnie smiled evilly. "NOOOOOOO! DON'T EVEN THINK ABOUT IT!" Freddy shouted, irate. "Oh, well, we'll just make you walk the plank," I rolled my eyes and smashed his face into the filthy toilet bowl. "MMMPPPH! MMMMPPHHH!" Freddy sputtered, thrashing and flailing in my grip. Foxy grinned and pulled the flush lever, causing Freddy to choke on toilet water and fall backwards, nearly unconscious.

"Y-you little shit!" Freddy coughed, water dripping down his face. "Hmph. You got what you deserved though!" I muttered as I helped Bonnie and Foxy drag his limp body back to Pirate Cove. "Oh no!" Foxy shouted. "What be the matter, captain?" Bonnie exclaimed. "All of our seamen have died! Oh no! What shall we do?" He pretended to be worried about the situation. "We'll need to capture ourselves a young lass, and breed her with the cabin boy!" I snickered. "Eyy! Good thinkin', mate!" Bonnie slapped me on the back, nearly knocking me off of the stage. "NOOOO! WHAT THE FUCK?!" Freddy screamed, terrified. Right at that moment, a lass- rather Chica, walked by, seeming to have recovered from the prank. "Ohh, I spot a fine lassie down yonder!" Foxy pointed at Chica, who shrieked and attempted to escape. Foxy leapt up into the air, thrust himself at Chica, and sent her crashing down onto the floor. "NOOO! WHAT ARE YOU DOING?!" Chica cried out. "Doin' some mating. Hehe." Foxy smiled lecherously as he dragged a screaming Chica into a closet. Bonnie followed behind him, helping me push Freddy in as well.

"The fuck!? Get me OUTTA HERE!" Freddy strained, pulling at the ropes forcefully in an attempt to escape, but to no avail. "Alright, 7 minutes, go!" I smirked as I slammed the closet door shut and locked it up. Several muffled screams sounded, presumably Chica's. Right about then, rustling noises sounded, accompanied by alarmed shrieks. Bonnie, Foxy, and I all started giggling like schoolchildren. "Guys! Psst! I think he's trying to bang her!" Bonnie hissed. "YEAH! GET HER IMPREGNATED, AND GET US SOME MORE SEAMEN!" I hollered. Shrill squeals and shrikes sounded from inside the closet, and clearly, they were not coming from Freddy. "Do you hear that?" Foxy asked, pressing his ear up to the door. Bonnie nodded. "Well, children, that's the sound of hard fucking!" He exclaimed, throwing up his arms in ecstasy. "YAAAAY! MOST VALUABLE LESSON EVER!" Bonnie shrieked happily, running around in circles. "HELP! CALL 911 AND THE POLICE!" Chica screamed from inside the closet. "HELP ME!" Chica sobbed frantically.

"No way, babygirl!" Another voice sounded from the closet. "EWW! OFF OF ME- HANDS OFF OF MY BOOBS!" Chica screamed furiously. A sickening crash sounded, followed by punches, slaps, and Freddy's screams. "Hey look! 7 minutes is up!" Bonnie announced, looking up at the clock. "Time's up, you perverts!" I smiled slyly as I slowly pulled open the closet door to reveal Chica, who was standing, arms crossed, over a badly injured Freddy. "Ugh! That stupid pervert bear!" Chica snapped, storming off into the distance. "Alright, ye mateys! Return to the ship!" Foxy commanded, leading us back to the stage. "A toast, to me, Co-Captain Bonnie, and Mate Goldie for repopulating our ship!" Foxy raised an imaginary glass into the air. "Hehe. Also for takin' care of that dumbass Freddy!" I snickered evilly and glanced in the direction of the closet.

* * *

 **Sorry 'bout the short chapter, but admit it. It was funny.**

 **No? Whatever.**


	5. A Visit From Uncle Frederick

I honestly don't remember what happened, but when I woke up, I myself- heard noises coming from the entrance of the pizzeria. Using all my power, I tried to teleport- but I could only reach the supply closet. "Damn it!" I thought angrily as I swung open the closet door and ran down the hallway that led to the entrance. "Well, where is he?" An unfamiliar voice sounded. It was- Kind of like Freddy's, except softer. And sounded less like a douche. "Oh my god, Goldie's a baby? What even happened?" A surprised female voice sounded. I peeked around a corner to find 4 unfamiliar figures standing at the doorway. "Oh, fuck me," I thought as I ran as quickly as possible into the nearest spot- The supply closet.

I quickly slammed the door shut behind me, panting furiously. Who the hell could those people possibly be? And why did they want to see me? Thoughts of suspicion and uneasiness streamed through my head. "Oh well, they can't find me now," I smiled and shrugged, then proceeded to lay down on the floor and curl up to sleep. But oh hell, was I wrong. Right as I was about to sink my imaginary knife into Freddy's neck, a blinding flash of light caused me to jolt awake. "And here, we have a wild Goldie in his natural habitat!" Several giggles sounded. Frowning, I squinted at the figures standing before me. The same ones that had appeared at the door earlier on! "Oh, wow. He REALLY is a baby," Another spoke.

"Who the hell are you?" I asked them in an irritable tone. "Yikes, you're sassier than I remember!" A pudgy bear stepped forward. He was slightly shorter than Freddy, with layers of unneeded makeup caked on his face. I glanced at the others that he had brought with him. Standing before me was a blue rabbit wearing sparkly purple eyeshadow, a chicken in an extremely skimpy outfit and bright makeup, and a withered gold rabbit who seemed to have pieces torn out of him. "Umm, why does everyone look like hookers over here?" I asked, scrutinizing each of their faces carefully. "Yeah, I've always wondered that too," The chicken replied, scratching the back of her head. "And isn't there supposed to be another one of you?" I said as I scanned the group for another member. "Oh, nah. She's too scared of you to come," The bear chuckled. These faces seemed all too familiar- Wait! I think I knew who they were!

"Hold on, aren't you guys the Toys? And some other fuckboy?" I asked, glaring suspiciously at the golden rabbit, who shot me an angry glare. "Hey, he remembers us!" Toy Bonnie shouted enthusiastically, darting back and forth amidst the group. "O.M.G! That is totes adorbs!" Toy Chica squealed, much to my annoyance. "Also, for your information, this fuckboy's called Vince," The golden rabbit raised up his finger and began to speak, but Toy Freddy cut him off; "His real name's Springtrap!" He hissed, but Vince shoved him backwards, behind Toy Chica and Toy Bonnie. "Hey, screw you guys, I'm getting a picture of this!" He exclaimed, pulling out his phone. "Oh, shit!" I thought furiously. He was NOT about to take a damn photo of me!" Anger rushed into my system and immediately took hold of me. I snarled and snatched Vince's phone, using all of my strength to destroy it. With one last scream, the phone snapped clean in half, electrical sparks leaping out and onto the floor. The toys gasped. Smoke poured out from inside of the now-broken electrical device. I stood, silent, breathing furiously as Vince stared at me in anger and disbelief.

"What the- That was a FUCKING NOKIA- HOW THE FUCK DID YOU BREAK THAT?!" He screamed, hands at the sides of his head. "I PAID $150 FOR THAT FUCKING PHONE-" He began, but stopped himself as quickly as he had started. "On the other hand, that was AWESOME!" He hollered thrusting his hand in front of my face. I reluctantly slapped my hand against his. "But still," Vince started, quickly snatching Toy Chica's phone and snapping a picture of me. "PAYBACK!" Toy Chica glared at Vince's immature display as Toy Freddy escorted the group out. "That was hella awesome! You know, we could come back next Wednesday..." Toy Bonnie's voice trailed off as the Toys exited the building. More shocked than anything, I slowly got up to my feet and walked down the hallway, shooting glances here and there as I went.

"Surprise motherfucker!" A female voice shouted right as a cold jet of water hit me square in the eye. Foxy's giggling immediately sounded, followed by Bonnie, who collapsed onto the floor in a fit of giggles. "Ahh, you guys- What the hell?!" I screamed, rubbing my eye in an attempt to force the water out. "Oh, Goldie. Sorry, We were kinda trying to get Freddy," Foxy's laughing immediately subsided as he began scratching his head in embarrassment. "Yeah, you dumbass!" Bonnie elbowed Foxy playfully in the stomach. "Shut up.." Foxy muttered. "Uh, you guys have no fucking idea who just showed up here!" I snapped, trying to redirect the conversation. "Who?" Both asked. "Some group of makeup-wearing whores and a half-destroyed rabbit..." I rolled my eyes. "Ugh, the Toys?" Bonnie scoffed. "Toy Bonnie's basically me- Except fake as hell!" She exclaimed angrily. "And Mangle? Ew, seeing her like that and knowing she's me counterpart- It makes me want to hurl!" Foxy shuddered. "Well guess what? They're coming back next week!" I threw my hands up into the air. Bonnie and Foxy groaned. Oh, boy, was I looking forward to Wednesday.


End file.
